I just lost multiple straight sets to my kids in Rockstar Table Tennis. Ugh, that was humiliating. Even worse is the fact that the kids have never played it for real at all. There I am trying to pull off my spin serves, and they just stand at the table, hit buttons, and crush me. I can’t seem to get past their octopus-like arms, and meanwhile they drive me ten feet back from the edge of the table, then cross me up and kill me.
The final nail in the coffin, and what made me get up and post, was when Elena asked “Hey, you hit the net! How do you hit the net? And you hit the underside of the table! How do you do that?”
You don’t want to know. I take some meager consolation in the thought that someday, your nine-year-old will do the equivalent to you.